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I found myself a new eye doctor and was excited when I learned his practice had Saturday hours. So, first thing this morning I headed over to his office and everything was going well.....until it wasn't!
My left eye doesn't always dilate the way it should. It's been that way for more years than I can remember and no one has ever worried about it. It's just one of the things that makes me.....me. Most people don't even notice it unless I point it out to them.
No one has ever worried about it except for that time I was in the hospital with pneumonia. LOL! Mount Sinai is a teaching hospital and so one morning the pulmonologist sent one of his interns in to check on me. She was very nice and checked everything including my eyes. (I thought it was kind of strange, but figured I'd go along with it.) Then I saw the immediate change in her posture when my eye didn't react to the light she was shining into my eye and then removing. (Hopefully, she has improved that "tell" since then!) I kind of laughed and said, "It's always been that way." I remember thinking that she seemed a little disappointed.
Anyway, back to today.....The girl who was doing all the things that need to be done before the eye doctor actually comes in had to listen to my story about my left eye when it once again failed to cooperate. She stopped what she was doing and went to get the doctor before putting in the drops to dilate my eyes.
He came in and tried the very same things she had tried and once again my eye was uncooperative. He decided to add one extra test (I guess that's what you call it!) to my exam. That was the first time I thought.....this is going to ruin my Saturday!
The doctor leaves and the drops get put into my eyes. I was asked to look at pictures and point out the one that looked 3D and I was asked to name the numbers in a color blind test. Then we headed over to the different machines for the different tests.....there were four of them.
When it was over the doctor came back into the room and did his exam. He told me my eyes looked good. I accepted the compliment in a very vain, "Yeah, I know I'm hot!" kind of way even though I'm pretty sure he was speaking medically.
Then the conversation took an ugly turn...
DR: You're pretty young for this...
ME: (cutting him of) I like where this is going.....young!
DR: I think we're looking at signs of Macular Degeneration
ME: No we're not! Not on a Saturday morning. This is not a Saturday conversation. This is a Monday conversation.
He showed me the pictures of my eyes and explained how my right eye looks clear then he pointed out some white spots on the picture of my left eye and explained that they weren't supposed to be there. He listed all the traits that are common in people who tend to get Macular Degeneration.....
fair skin, blue eyes, Irish decent.....
I have a check mark in all those boxes.
ME: This isn't a Saturday conversation!
He said he wants to see me again in a month for another field of vision test and that he is going to order a special filter.
ME: Seriously, all the old people that live around here and I'm the one you need a special filter for?
DR: No, we need one in the office anyway. The other doctors and I were just discussing it.
(He was talking about my left eye with the other doctors!)
ME: Tell me the truth, are you just pretending that I have this so you'll have an excuse to order this filter?
DR: No, I wouldn't do that to you. I am going to give you some vitamins for your eyes though.
He then handed me a handful of PreserVision samples and sent me over to pick out and get fitted for new glasses.
After I was finished with everything and was back at the front desk scheduling my next appointment the doctor just happened to wander over. He saw my appointment date looked at me and said...
This appointment is on a Tuesday. We will have this conversation on a Tuesday.
I laughed. I laughed because he got my sense of humor, but I also laughed because that Tuesday is the day before I plan to leave for my annual birthday vacation.
If this guy thinks I'm worried about my Saturdays, just wait until he tries to ruin Me-vember and my birthday!