The last two weeks have been horrible for me. HORRIBLE!
School is starting. Changes have been made. People have been moved. Backs have been stabbed. I've heard nothing but, "You can't", "You don't", "You won't", etc.
It's taking a big toll on me and my spirit and my soul. A bigger toll than I can even start to explain.
I woke up this morning and got angry because I didn't have any Pop tarts. Seriously!
I have no idea why I thought there should be Pop tarts in the house. I can't remember when I last ate a Pop tart. I mean, it hasn't been days or weeks or even months. It's been decades, people. DECADES!
Angrily, I got dressed, grabbed the camera, blasted some classic Springsteen in the car and hit the interstate in search of Pop tarts.
I'm not sure why I thought there would be a need to photographically document the purchase of Pop tarts. I'm not sure why I got on the interstate when the grocery store is literally blocks away. Honestly, I didn't even realize that I had done either one of those things until some time later.
When the radio station I was listening to no longer came in clearly because I was out of range it was like I came out of a trance and realized what I was doing. I immediately had two thoughts...
1. I don't think I'm in Dade County anymore!
2. I can do this! I can just keep going and never go back. I have $60, a credit card, a half charged phone and a car that is still fixed wrong. I can do this!
I decided it was going to be wonderful! I would drive until I found some quaint little town in another state that didn't even have a school and then I would stay there forever. I would be the mysterious stranger that was new in town and didn't want to talk about where she came from or why she left. I would meet a tall, handsome stranger with a questionable past and he would remind me of what it was like to be happy and carefree. Together, we would become the town's "it couple".
It was going to be just like a Nicholas Sparks novel and it was going to be awesome!
I knew that the first thing I needed to do was get off the interstate. You have to travel on back roads when you are running away from the city and searching for a quaint town. I mean, everybody knows that, right?
I didn't find my tall handsome stranger or a quaint town with no school. I never even made it out of Florida. But, I did find some interesting things. Things that looked the way I felt.....empty, discarded, abandoned, unwanted, alone.
Note to self and to others: Take the camera and disappear more often. It's the best therapy there is!
I stopped for gas and as I got back into the car I heard my phone ringing. I didn't get to it in time, but it was Orange Croc Guy and I had missed several calls from him. I sat there staring at the phone while trying to decide what to do when he called again. The strangest phone call in the world went like this...
OCG: Where are you?
ME: I didn't have any Pop tarts!
OCG: You eat Pop tarts?
ME: I have a sucky job and an even suckier boss and I'm not coming home because I don't want to go to work on Monday.
OCG: I thought we had plans today...
ME: I'm not coming home. I'm running away.
OCG: You don't have to run away from home. Quit acting like this...
ME: Quit telling me what to do! I'm tired of no one listening to me!
OCG: OK, I'm listening...
OCG: Are you there?
OCG: Where are you?
ME: I'm not sure.
OCG: Are you coming home?
OCG: Why not?
ME: There's no reason to.
OCG: I bet you can think of at least one reason to come home if you try.
ME: Well....in October...The Walking Dead comes back on.
OCG: OK, I'm gonna need you to dig a little deeper here.
ME: There's Me-vember.
OCG: Anything else? Anything at all?
ME: Christmas...I like presents...
OCG: OK, why don't you just call me back when you figure out what you're doing.
We ended the call and I hit the road again. I found this place...
It was while walking these trails that I decided I needed more than $60, a credit card, a half charged phone and a car that is still fixed wrong. I needed some important things like clean underwear and a toothbrush.
After several hours and a little help from the GPS, my melt down was over and I headed for home. Several hours after that, I arrived to find OCG sitting on my couch.
OCG: You decided to come home?
ME: I didn't have a toothbrush.
Right now, as I type this, there is a Walking Dead DVD playing on the TV. There is an over sized, half full bowl of popcorn and four empty beer bottles on the table in front of me and OCG is snoring beside me.
Right now, as I type this, my life is good and I am happy and I never even got those damn Pop tarts.